What Would Women Like in Femdom Art?

I like FemDom art which is geared to the woman, her enjoyment and her feelings. Most FemDom art has a woman watching, on the sidelines or she is performing an act of abuse. In neither of these situations is it really about her and what she wants.

I don’t like the extreme stuff because it doesn’t seem real. Extremes seem geared to his fantasies, not hers. She isn’t really getting anything from what’s going on but it’s all set up for pleasing him. Like a little kid who wants his Mother to watch him play. It’s nice for the kid but kind of boring for the Mother (unless she brings a good book).

I like her to be dressed in ordinary clothes, not fetish costumes with ridiculous high heels she can hardly walk in. Corsets which force her to stand rather than be comfortable. Boots so high she can’t bend her legs. Skirts short enough to show her butt. If she is scantily dressed I don’t feel she is really in charge. It’s all a performance for him. I don’t identify with women dressed up like automations.

I like her to be with a man equal to herself in looks and proportions.  I prefer him to be muscular, strong looking and not sissy or down-trodden. I don’t mind if his expression is a little peeved or disgruntled. I don’t like the adoring look, the overly trusting or begging and needy. It looks sexier if I really feel this was all her idea and he really is at her mercy, being tormented and teased as she likes.

Having said that, I don’t the man to see the victim in the photo or the story. He should be there because he wants this. He may not want or like the torment he endures in the moment, but overall this is what he wants.  The “poor little me” style of photos really annoys me.

I do like where there is some sign of care, sensuality and sexiness (not sex but the feeling of intimacy). A connection between the Domme and sub, a relationship being maintained, versus performance art.

For me the best FemDom art has humour (irony and sarcasm), not too sadistic, but the Domme/ FemDom should be having fun at his expense. I especially like the men in peril theme.

When I find something with just a man in a cage (for instance), his head down, his smooth muscular back the focus of the photo… that’s sexy to me. I can imagine the feel of his skin as I reach my hand through the bars of his cage. That’s the man I want to let out of his cage, tease for awhile more and then make love to.

Almost all BDSM art is produced for a male audience. Heterosexual dominant men are happy to see a lone female in bondage. A male top can imagine that he put her there.

Submissive and masochistic straight guys want to see the female top. A mere male in bondage would bore them. (It wouldn’t me.) An artist works either for the paying customers (so few, I know) and himself.

Source: What Would Women Like in Femdom Art? – Femdom Artists

No One Actually Gets Flashing Right Any More

flashing girl

This photo came from a site with photos of women flashing for the camera. Out of all the photos I looked at on the main site, this is the only one which actually looked like flashing. (The expression on her face is great too. She looks happy and excited, about to flash out a boob).

Flashing should be quick and impulsive.

It should not take several minutes while she poses and does a strip tease. That is not a flash. It should not be a movie version with extra fetishes thrown in. A real flash is quick fun and flirty.

I’m not keen on seeing men flashing. It’s not so cute and fun then. But, I don’t really want to catch women flashing in public either. Anything sensual, kinky or fetish in nature should not be done in public because you can’t assume the consent of the general public. So don’t over expose yourself in that way either.

How to Become a Flashing Flirt

Try it when you’re just alone.

Next time you have time alone take a shower, give yourself some pampering and then leave the bathroom without a towel. Make the walk out of the bathroom, naked. See how that feels. It’s a safe way to get started and you don’t even have to look at yourself in the mirror if you don’t want to.

Take a nude selfie.

Don’t send it to anyone but imagine someone (someone charming and sexy) and take the photo for him/ her. Pose. Get arty and draw on your skin. Do a peep show if you don’t want to show all. If you get inspired to send the photo, take a break and leave it for the next day. Make sure you have no regrets.

If you’ve gone this far try actually flashing.

Be nude under a full length coat, dressing gown, something concealing which opens easily and quickly. Stand at a window, indoors. Not one where you know people will be watching, but a a view which takes a risk of being caught. Then, quickly open and close your coat. Don’t make it slow, don’t make sure someone has seen you and, no repeats.

Flashing is Flirting

Stick to the flash, don’t give them more than that. It’s the boldness of the flash which keeps it fun. It’s a quick risk for people who don’t want to expose themselves but enjoy that daring impulse to do something a bit naughty or taboo. You may get tempted to go to the next level and become a streaker. Don’t, unless you’re really sure you can face seeing that much of yourself exposed the next day and the next and when ever someone puts it up on YouTube.

Your Sexual Bucket List?

The original list came from Body + Soul. I picked out those which interested me. Have you tried making a sexual bucket list? I think it should really be a sensual bucket list so you could enjoy more sexual things without a partner too.

  • Plan a surprise bedroom picnic. Fill your basket with goodies that delight. Make sure you have batteries, and include toys for two, not just vibes for her alone. Pull one bedroom picnic treat out at a time and take turns with each other.
  • Tantric breathing. – Breathing, hearing and feeling each other’s breath creates intimacy and arousal between you.
  • Restrict your or your partner’s movement or senses.
  • Fulfill a fantasy.
  • Have cybersex.
  • Make penetration forbidden. – Light a candle and focus on foreplay and sexplay in whatever way you want until the candle burns out. Only then is penetration allowed!
  • Caress each other in unexpected places.
  • Give a prelude teaser. – Take the initiative.
  • Indulge with a scalp massage.
  • Don’t just French kiss. – Use shallow kisses to stimulate his lips with your tongue and teeth, his lips have thousands more nerve endings than in his mouth.
  • Keep the lights on.