Red Flannel Sheet Set

Some women like shoes, not me. I’ve got two pairs of shoes and a pair of boots. I pretty much wear the same footwear all season long. I don’t love shoes. I do love new sheets, bedding and reading a great book in bed.

Today I found red flannel sheets at The Bay (a Canadian department store). I have another flannel set from The Bay and they are excellent. Not the pilly set which I bought (in a great masculine colour at another store). I bet this red set is just as wonderful, soft and thick. I’m really tempted to pull out my magic credit card, I even have a Bay store card which I haven’t used in awhile.

Would you love to fall asleep and wake up in these sheets?

redflannelsheetsSource: Home | Sheets & Pillowcases | Four-Piece Flannel Sheet Set | Hudson’s Bay

Then I found pink or green polka dotted sheets in a cotton blend. Great colours. Very Spring! I know Winter is on the way but… how could you wake up feeling blue if you’re surrounded by pink, lime green an polka dots?!

sheetsgreendots sheetspinkdots

Source: Hudson’s Bay store online.

What Would Women Like in Femdom Art?

I like FemDom art which is geared to the woman, her enjoyment and her feelings. Most FemDom art has a woman watching, on the sidelines or she is performing an act of abuse. In neither of these situations is it really about her and what she wants.

I don’t like the extreme stuff because it doesn’t seem real. Extremes seem geared to his fantasies, not hers. She isn’t really getting anything from what’s going on but it’s all set up for pleasing him. Like a little kid who wants his Mother to watch him play. It’s nice for the kid but kind of boring for the Mother (unless she brings a good book).

I like her to be dressed in ordinary clothes, not fetish costumes with ridiculous high heels she can hardly walk in. Corsets which force her to stand rather than be comfortable. Boots so high she can’t bend her legs. Skirts short enough to show her butt. If she is scantily dressed I don’t feel she is really in charge. It’s all a performance for him. I don’t identify with women dressed up like automations.

I like her to be with a man equal to herself in looks and proportions.  I prefer him to be muscular, strong looking and not sissy or down-trodden. I don’t mind if his expression is a little peeved or disgruntled. I don’t like the adoring look, the overly trusting or begging and needy. It looks sexier if I really feel this was all her idea and he really is at her mercy, being tormented and teased as she likes.

Having said that, I don’t the man to see the victim in the photo or the story. He should be there because he wants this. He may not want or like the torment he endures in the moment, but overall this is what he wants.  The “poor little me” style of photos really annoys me.

I do like where there is some sign of care, sensuality and sexiness (not sex but the feeling of intimacy). A connection between the Domme and sub, a relationship being maintained, versus performance art.

For me the best FemDom art has humour (irony and sarcasm), not too sadistic, but the Domme/ FemDom should be having fun at his expense. I especially like the men in peril theme.

When I find something with just a man in a cage (for instance), his head down, his smooth muscular back the focus of the photo… that’s sexy to me. I can imagine the feel of his skin as I reach my hand through the bars of his cage. That’s the man I want to let out of his cage, tease for awhile more and then make love to.

Almost all BDSM art is produced for a male audience. Heterosexual dominant men are happy to see a lone female in bondage. A male top can imagine that he put her there.

Submissive and masochistic straight guys want to see the female top. A mere male in bondage would bore them. (It wouldn’t me.) An artist works either for the paying customers (so few, I know) and himself.

Source: What Would Women Like in Femdom Art? – Femdom Artists

Pick Your Adventure, Domme Style

My boyfriend has recently told me he’s always wanted a femdom. I keen on doing this for him, but I’m not sure how to go about it. What kind of dirty talk do femdoms use, and would I get him to do anything I want him to do and not things he would want to do for me?

Fake, or not? This is one of those borderline comments. Even if it is comment spam, the question is at least relevant.

First, FemDoms may use a book of instructions but there is no guarantee we will follow them.

That’s the difference between being a FemDom (I prefer Domme) or a paid sex worker. Your rules – your way, mostly. Of course, you don’t set fire to him or anything extreme you may do in a fit of anger and regret later. You also take his wishes into account.

Dirty talk is a fetish. Do you like it? If so, try it out in reality and see if both of you like it. Maybe it sounded, or looked, good in pornography but doesn’t work out so well in actuality. I don’t really like dirty talk. I’d have more fun coming up with punishments for a dirty talker than being a dirty talker. But, I would not encourage dirty talk just for the sake of getting “punishment”.

When I think punishment, it is not in quotation marks. It’s real, it’s not all that pleasant or enjoyable. Punishment does not have to be something awful, painful or extreme. The best punishments are something he doesn’t like, would rather avoid but isn’t allergic to. This is where you need to know your boy, his likes and dislikes. What makes him squirm, twitch or need to be rushed to the hospital?

Secondly, what doesn’t he want to do for you?

Why doesn’t he want to do it? Does he have a good, valid and acceptable reason? Pour yourself a nice glass of wine (or coffee in my case as I don’t care for wine that much). Leave your boy to write out a list of reasons why he won’t do what you want him to do. Ask for at least 50 reasons, or however long it takes for you to enjoy that glass of wine without having to share any.

On the other hand, what do you want him to do?

Have a list of your own, prepare ahead.

  • Learn how to give a manicure and pedicure and then pamper you once he has mastered the skills and bought the right colours of nail polish?
  • Clean kitchen, garage, bathroom and muck out the inside of the oven until it sparkles to your satisfaction?
  • Make dinner (from your menu choices), clean up and then become your chauffeur for a night out with the girls?
  • Be your silent, unmoving, foot stool while you watch the TV shows he usually whines about having to watch with you?
  • Polish and wax your car and perform minor repairs, oil changes, etc?

The list is as endless as you want it to be. If he doesn’t want to do something he needs to give good reasons for it. He isn’t running the show – that’s the point of Dom versus sub. Pleasing him isn’t going to work unless you (the Domme) are pleased as well.

So you need to know what pleases you. It may have nothing to do with sex, fetishes or being kinky. Or, cater his kinky desires to your own needs, wants and desires. If he wants to perform domestic service – give him an apron. If he wants to be humiliated – shine a spotlight on him and you don’t even need to say a word. If he wants to sniff your feet – give him your shoes and boots to clean and polish first (no spit shine!).

Do you want to see him squirm? Do you want to tease him? Then play with him but in your own way. What would be fun for you? Make it last. Torment him. Tease him and keep him guessing. Make sure it doesn’t get monotonous for you though. Toss in a few surprises along the way. Or just end things when you’ve had enough. Choose how things end for him and yourself. Do you want an orgasm? Should he be allowed to have a “happy ending”? You, the Domme, decides.